The journey

Wow, how amazing is life?

I can't help but miss everything back home, it isn't that I am homesick, I just miss the things I know. I realize I have changed, in huge and major ways. I know there are things in me that still need to be rooted out, and things that need to be matured. There is a lot of life baggage that I have that I find really hard to let go of. I can't imagine it will be any easier when I am older, so I want to do as much maturing and changing now, even if I think it hurts a bit. I see the future, I am not saying I know what it is, but I can see something on the horizon, and it seems so far away, I don't want to let go of what is right behind me. But if I am to get to that place, then I must let go. It isn't about turning your back on things, it isn't about forgetting or even healing, all those things will happen with God and time. It is about letting go. Thats it. I don't know how to let go.

I dunno if anyone can relate. I feel like a little kid complaining. But there are somethings I just don't want to get over, I don't want to put to rest. I just want it to go away. Nothing is ruining my trip here, nothing could. But as I am learning, from the ages of like 15- (i hear) till 27, is the toughest time. I gotta say the past three years of my life have been crazy, ups and downs, to be honest way more ups than downs, but the downs are just so emotional, so life changing and real, long lasting and life or death.

I have realized so much about myself here, so much! I've realized it's not a bad thing to get a compliment, weird huh? I don't really get them much, so the people here who have told me about what they see in me, has blown me away. I am surprised so much, the strength of God is seen by people, all we've got to do is live it. I've also once again seen that my writings can have an impact on people. Not many in recent years have noticed my writings, a few have said "Oh thats nice", or "Wow, that's deep." But a few here have come to embrace it and urge me to do more, urge me to grow in it, and to keep writing, not because it is deep, but because it has spoken to them. One said "You have so much to say and you say it so well." I was so blown away. I couldn't look her in the eye when she said that to me.

I dunno what to say, I have a lot hitting me right now,God, relationship, School, Travel, none of these things are bad, but all seem so heavy, so i walk with weight, but Jesus has told us that He wishes to be our rock, the one who carries the heaviness with us. Will I let him? I try some days, I don't others. Today I didn't let him, I just tried to carry it, I did it, but it was horrible. I hurt, I cried, I prayed and I was stubborn. Tomorrow? I don't know what I will do tomorrow. I can only wake up and give it a try. Jesus said, "I come to give life, and life more abundantly." I want to live! I want to hop and skip every step, I want on my pogo stick and I want to smile and laugh all the way home. So I will, I am an alien to this place. My strength is not my own. So there is my BLOG for the day, time to finish editing my paper, it is 132am haha, life of a college student! WOOOOOOO.

I love all of you, e-mail me or comment on my blog look at my pictures do all sorts of things for me today! haha, laugh... look in the mirror and flex, even if you have no muscles, it always makes me laugh when i do that haha! ohh sad... haha! Do a little dance even if you don't feel like it, it really will liven up your heart, and smile, force you lips to smile and move your eyebrows around to fit the smile and do weird fish faces. That is the best! Any way, so much, so little, the cat and the fiddle. Bet you didn't see that coming!

-Mike

Happy Thanksgiving

I just wanted to say a quick hello! I love all of you and am very thankful for all of your love, prayers and support. It has been good and hard, growing and rewarding. I am having a wonderful time having the adventure of my life.

Check out my pictures link ---------------------------------------------->

any way having a great time a good weekend instore for myself. Eat up the turkey and let those muscles go limp as you fall into silent content comatose. Love you all, God Bless.

-Mike

Plans, God and why...

So much is going on, school, life and if that isn't enough i already ate all the chocolate my mom sent me, it is gone... ;-(

So my Christmas break is going to look something like this...

Dec 15-21(22)
- Ireland; Dublin etc.
Dec 22(23)-Jan 4
- Norway; Oslo-->Trondhiem
Jan 4(5)-8(9)
- Austria-->Spain

Thats my idea, still scrounging money
My plane from Birmingham to Dublin will be $34 dollars!!! so cheap!
Plane from Dublin to Oslo will be $28 Dollars!!!!
But my big expense will be my eurail pass; somewhere between $611-645, which will get me around in Ireland, Norway, Austria and Spain and where ever else I decide to go, haha.
Then food and lodging, yuk!

God well, the Lord is showing me so much, the work of His hand in others, so easy to see it in others than in yourself. Also he is just showing me myself, scary thing, who out of any of us really wants to look at ourselves haha. Ohh man, there is a reason my generation especially surrounds themselves with TVs, Video Games, etc etc etc, we hate to hear our own minds... Are you able to just sit, quietly for long periods of time, do you feel like your wasting time, do you feel like it could be better used to do other things like watch TV, wash that counter, pick up that room, or practice your golf swing. We are a society of ADD kids, I know I am, my attention span is about as long as the width of my hair. 30 second commercials, instant gratification, microwaves and big macs, we want what we want now, pack all our lives into one day and try to forget about tomorrow.
Any way, slow down friends, you know the things that are vital, but cut some things out. One of my favorite things to do when I was in St. Paul, when ever I was there, I would always drive up to the capital and the cathedral, and I would just look at how huge the buildings were, then I would go into the Cathedral, and pick a pew, sit and just be in wonder at the hands that built that place. I would stare and just be silent. God knows us, and for some reason, when we go inside the big Church buildings we feel kind of safe, we remember the early years, for some of us they were a little earlier than others, but we are reminded of something simpler, when we didn't bog ourselves down with the strife of this life. God will come when you take a step towards Him. If your burnt out, sick of long nights and short days, or just wanting to just stop, sit and be in awe of who God is... Psalm 18

"I love you, Lord; you are my strength.
The Lord is my rock, my Fortress, and my Savior;
my God is my rock, in whom I find protection.
He is my shield, the strength of my salvation, and my stronghold."

The last time I was in the Cathedral, and a few times before that, I was sitting in awe, praying and reading. And a guy, a different person every time, came to me and asked me if I could help him, he told me his problems and his journey, it ended with me giving him no money, though I know he wanted it, and it wasn't because I didn't want to, but because I am a college kid and am as broke as he is. So I prayed for him. I prayed for the Lord's prevision, and for his protection and love.
When I opened my eyes, the guy was just starring at me. He didn't speak for a few seconds, lost in the want of someone truly trying to help not just giving to push a man away, he noticed that he wasn't a burden to me.

What do you love to do? I just ask, love to love.

I don't know where that man is now, maybe out on the street drunk, maybe begging for money, but maybe, just maybe he realized that his life has value, and it was worth more than a beggars ransom, but worth his heart to try at life instead of being a victim. Maybe, like most of you, love gave him courage. Find your Cathedral my friends, find your house of God, your house of Worship and long to be in awe of God. Your movement towards Him, will draw Him near. And if your really feeling daring today, ask Him for more. More of life, more of love, more of Him. Just beware of what you wish for. Hahaha. Love you all.

-Mike

Love conquors all Fear

I dunno what to write, the home sickness has finally struck me!

I told a friend all i wanted to do was drive in the red truck down a gravel road blaring some country music with the windows down. With uncontrollable events on either side of the ocean, I could really go for a late night conversation with my mom over tea or chocolate-chip cookies. I could also go for an old movie while sitting in my dads lap in his chair. and I am 21 years old haha.

But I am so glad I am here, if I was anywhere else other than here right now it wouldn't be right. I am exactly where I ought to be with the things of life raining down over my head.

Psalm 23

The Lord is my Shepard I shall not want,
He makes me lie down in green pastures, He leads me besides still water,
He restores my soul.

He leads me in the paths of righteousness,
For His name sake.

Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death I will fear no evil
for you are with me
your rod and your staff they comfort me.

You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies
you anoint my head with oil
my cups runs over

Surely goodness and mercy will follow me all the days of my life
and I will dwell in the house of the Lord -
Forever.

I wrote in a poem once, life comes at a funny time in ones own existence.

Life is just goofy.

So I'll keep living, I am sure all you old timers out there are saying, ohhh man there is mike over in England whining about life. You have a point. But here is one for ya,

No matter where you go... there you are.

Beaches, cities, home or abroad. You still have your mind, your heart and your soul.

Faith, hope and love, and the greatest of these is love.

-Mike

The Good things...

You have no idea how amazing it is to get chocolate from your mother when your like 2 thousand miles away!!! Oh man... you have no idea what it feels like to eat all that chocolate in like one sitting!!! YUK!

Well not all of it, but a lot!

Life has been grand, I went through a little burn out, and am still resting because of it, but the reason for it... well they are the best reasons for burn out I have ever had. I went to Norway for ten days, got back had three days of school, went to Scotland for four days, came back and wrote a paper or two, and now I am just worn out. I thought like 3 days of just laying low would cure me, but it is proving to be alittle more than that. I am still tired and my mind is just on the edge between, crabby and happy. But it is alright, its half the battle just realizing that your burnt out, if you can admit it, then it is just stupid not to do anything about it. So I am spending as much time with God as I can. It is the only thing to do. I get rest, I drink orange juice eat ok, and be with God.

Today I went to this art museum in downtown Birmingham, ohh it was so beautiful. I was proud of myself because I one point I saw a bust (Head and shoulder sculpture) of this guy and I recognized the name. There is this guy in British Politics his name is Edmund Burke. He was a conservative durring the time of the american and french revolutions. He spoke out against the french and their destroying of the Monarchy. Any way, when Burke first came into Politics he was a clerk type guy for this man names, Charles, 2nd Marquis of Rockingham. And the bust was of that guy, Charles. I was blown away. I wasy most blown away that I remembered all that, then blown away that I didn't learn it in class but in a book I am reading about Burke for my own leasuire. Then I was blown away at the fact that I was looking at the man, whom brought Burke into Politics. Burke is known as one of the best Orators of British Politics... ever! And the best rhetoric writer of politics in the world for his time, though he was mainly concerned with British Politics, he had contemporaries of men like Thomas Paine! I mean come on! If you are known as one of the best, during a time of such great writers as PAINE! Wow your damn good. Any way, I am trying to learn about Burke, leanr from the best you know. Even people who didn't like him, still knew he was the best. But that aside, if you have any questions about Burke just e-mail me i'll tell you more haha.

Well, I went to the museum, and I was frustrated, because I was there to do an assignment, and the whole things was like 12 pages of questions, so I did it, but every questions was the SAME QUESTION just for a different work of art. Ohhh man I wanted to take my brain out of my head and give it a rest, you can only answer a question so many ways, before you want to rip the paper in half. So I was a bit crabby, then we; Jill, Kat, JR and I went to star-bucks (i hate american branch coffee shops, i miss the good old original ones, like Amazing Grace, or Jarabeks) I got an orange juice, cause coffee would of killed me. I felt better after that, but still alittle slow. I just need sleep.

Love you all, check out my pictures off the link there >>>>>>

And comment on my page, i wanna see who is reading, if anyone!?

Happenings

So I have been up to a lot lately. I have been pretty busy so I haven't written much.

I went to London...

- I saw the original Alice in Wonderland
- The oldest manuscript of Baowulf
- Stamps from the Stamp Act (It started our revolution, it was a patriotic moment)
- A Gutenberg Bible
- The oldest Bible in the World
- The original Magna Carta
- Tons of 13, 14, 15th century manuscripts.

It was amazing.

I went to the Globe Theater, it was awesome.

Got to see Big Ben, Westminster Abbey, The millennium Bridge, the London Bridge and St. Pauls Cathedral.

Then when I got back, I went to a Museum.
- I looked at some very old amazing paintings, while listening to Ave Maria on my iPod, it sent me back in time pretty much. Haha.
- I was able to touch and read and page through, some 13-15th century Illuminated Manuscripts. It was pretty amazing.

So this weekend, I played in an Ultimate Frisbee Tournament. We ended up 3-4-1 we got 6 out of 12. It was tons of fun. I broke my toe nail, and got a bunch of gym burn, I scored tons of point threw tons of points, and laid out (dove for the frisbee) tons of times. I am sore bruised and totally content with life, haha. It was a great time. Now I am just waking up, it is about 1pm. It was a crappy night of sleep I think I was too tired from the weekend. I need to do some homework, and finish a book I have been reading. I need to eat and get outside sometime too. Well I miss you guys and love you all a lot. If you feel compelled to send me anything feel free; Reese's Peanut butter Cups, brownies, chocolate chip cookies... just an example of the generosity I will accept, and you know money is always a good thing, ok i'll stop being so honest... CYA!!!!

-Mike

Banks

So today I went to the bank, called HSBC. I went in and had all the stuff ready and the letter they sent me in the mail. I talk to the guy and it happens that I need another piece of information and I need to get a letter from the university saying I am actually a student!! I am kind of peeved. Just because I had a check in my pocket, what is wrong with opening an account and putting money in it. You are getting my money, just give me the account! People the world over trying to protect me from me!

Any way... if thats the only thing I have to complain about life is good. And it is. I tried out with the Ultimate Club team here at Birmingham, and it went well. It was more of a show people how to play, because it is very new to Britain, and then I just showed off a little, and they talked to me afterwards and invited me to the club practice tonight at 6. I also went to Church yesterday, it went really well. I am noticing how much God is making me a leader, even though I feel so dry, spiritually speaking. I also find more and more, how we are all followers. I was told once that when we are leaders, we are always out in front, it is a lonely place. But with Jesus it is different. You can not out lead the Leader! You always, no matter where you are have Him by your side. I was at the service, and I was reading Psalm 139 I love that Psalm!!! And then the pastor got up and prayed, he said, "Lord... you knit us together in our mothers womb... we are fearfully and wonderfully made." I let a few tears go. It was Psalm 139. He is leading hearts to His heart, and when we allow Jesus to take leadership we all walk as One, not in an uncreative One, not in a zombie walk of brain washing One. We walk as we were created to be. All of us together, with the depths of Cor 13 Love! I dare you! Read Psalm 139 and 1Cor 13 and live it out. Make it your reality. It will change you. And yes old dogs can learn new tricks.

I love you all. Miss ya. Send me some e-mails haha. also here is my address...

Univeristy of Birmingham : Hall Manor House H5
Bristol Road South, Northfield
Birmingham
B31 2AE

Talk to you all later. I am going to London this weekend, so expect some pictures early next week.